Going to the doctor with sleep problems: a logical start but not always the end

About one in two people who visit their doctor with insomnia complaints are prescribed sleep medication

At some point, you know for sure: I can't do this on my own anymore. You've been sleeping poorly for weeks, sometimes months. Your mind races at night, your body is constantly on edge, and during the day you're working your butt off. So you call the doctor's assistant and make an appointment with your GP.

It's a logical step. And often a courageous one.

The doctor listens. Asks how long you've been having trouble sleeping. Whether it's falling asleep, staying asleep, or waking up too early. Whether there's stress. Grief. Relationship problems. Work issues. Something physical. Sometimes a blood test is done, sometimes not.

In many cases, there's no clear medical cause. That moment can be disorienting. You sense something is wrong, yet everything seems fine at the same time.

Then comes the usual advice. Set bedtimes. Fewer screens. More relaxation. Less coffee and alcohol. No naps during the day. They're not bad. They're also true. But if you've been lying awake for weeks or months, it feels a bit thin.

Sleeping pills

Sometimes sleeping pills are discussed. Or you bring them up yourself, because you're really exhausted. Only temporarily. For emergencies. In moderation.

Doctors prescribe sleeping pills for 1 out of 2 people who suffer from insomnia.

Sleeping pills really do work. They dull the pain. They make you drowsy. Sometimes you suddenly sleep through the night for a few hours. That can feel like relief. But often something else comes along with it: uncertainty. You might sleep better, but the confidence that you can do this on your own slowly fades into the background.

I've rarely met anyone who regained their confidence in sleep through pills. Many, however, lost that confidence. It happened to me too. I used sleep medication sparingly, but I stuck with it, even when I was falling asleep again. It was so easy: take a pill before an important day or a stressful event. But the next morning, I suffered from brain fog, and I felt like I'd lost control of my sleep.

What is often missing

What's often missing in a doctor's appointment is time. Time to explain what insomnia actually is. That it's not a broken sleep button, but a system that has become overly vigilant. That fear, control, and good intentions don't bring sleep closer, but rather push it further away.

My experience

I was stuck in that same cycle for a long time. Doctor. Advice. Medication. Good intentions everywhere. And yet, the night became increasingly fraught. Only when I stopped searching for the solution did something begin to shift. Not because I started sleeping better, but because I approached being awake differently. I felt increasingly comfortable lying awake, instead of fighting it. That's not a quick fix. But it is a sustainable one.

Really learning to sleep

Don't get me wrong: seeing a doctor about insomnia is wise. Sometimes even necessary. But it's good to understand what you can and can't find there. Medical care can support, reassure, and set boundaries. But learning to sleep again—really sleep—sometimes requires something else. Less control. Less struggle. More trust in a body that isn't broken, but overprotective.

And yes, that sounds easier than it is. But it is the way back. And if you'd like, I'll walk with you for a bit.